Author Archives: Eric Francisco

Indiana Jones Could Have Survived The Nuke After All

Personally, I think Indiana could have definitely survived if he knew karate.


Someone Buy Me This God Damn Jurassic Park/Power Rangers Crossover T-Shirt

It would only be better if it were, uhh, Jeff Goldblum as a, uhh, Power Ranger.

Wrestling Removed From The Olympics

“You can’t see me!” -Wrestling, during the 2020 Olympics.

The Red Power Rangers Take Over Manhattan, Shut Up It’s Great

I would be OK if these become the last surviving relics of our civilization.

Zach Galifianakis’ “Between Two Ferns” Is The Only Oscar Pregame You Need

If only the awards show were as entertaining as this.

Elizabeth Olsen And Bryan Cranston Are Going To Run Like Hell From Godzilla in 2014

Daniel Day-Lewis will also star as the titular character. (I’m joking, but could you imagine?)

G4TV Falls and Esquire Network Rises

I ain’t mad, just a little sad.

“The Shield” WWE Authentic Tee Fails To Impress

It’s definitely not Austin 3:16.

The Cast Of The New “Power Rangers” Movie (From A Guy Who Knows It’s Never Going To Happen)

Who should be in a (totally not in production) Power Rangers reboot?

We Just Might Have To Avenge Something

The Avengers was awesome, but you already know that. Although I personally thought the 3D sucked, but that’s just me. When the credits rolled in the theater at 2:30 AM almost a week and a half ago, there was a sinking feeling in my gut. It tugged away as I drove out of the parking […]

Castle Invasian (aka The “Harold & Kumar” Essay I Got a 95 On)

The grade is totally not arbitrary and subject to the opinion of one college professor. Nope. Not at all.

Sess-ion Over: Farewell, Adam Sessler

As the sun begins to set on my spring semester (actually I can’t tell because it’s cloudy and drizzling at the moment), I’ve been preparing myself to resume my blogging duties on a more regular basis. But in-depth discussions about the return of Brock Lesnar or what I think of Mass Effect 3 will have […]

“Quick, It’s Starting!”: The Best TV Opening Titles (In My Opinion Anyway)

I don’t know about you, but one of the things I enjoy most out of TV are the opening credits. They get the mood just right. Opening credits are their own work of art, sometimes more memorable than than the actual shows. They either tell the show’s synopsis in a stylish or fun way (e.g., […]

Please Stick To The Rivers And Lakes You’re Used To: Fighting Games and “The Crossover”

Three years ago I would have been excited about this. Today, I’m kind of pissed. It’s no secret that I love fighting games, and I see nothing better than characters from different worlds dukeing it out. Nothing! That’s what attracts us to the world of sports, or movies, or comic books, or porn (I do […]

When The Wolf Shows Its Teeth: What The 2012 Academy Awards Really Meant

It’s been a couple days and I still have a slight twitch in my eye. The 84th Annual Academy Awards occurred this past week, in case you didn’t know and/or were watching the NBA All-Star game. I took to Twitter and Facebook during the show, riffing Mystery Science Theater-style, like the tens of thousands of […]